5 reasons why I am glad the festive fun has finished

The decorations have come down (to the heartbroken tears of one little boy); the selection boxes put up high out of reach (to the heartbroken tears of one little girl); the DS3, iPad and Wii are all back on rationed time (to the heartbroken tears of one bigger boy) and the empty bottles of Prosecco have been recycled but not replaced (to the heartbroken tears of one Mummy).

Christmas was aces. On toast. With jiggle bells on.
We all had a blinkin ball. But tomorrow the children are all back in school and it’s time to hit the ground running with work. And fitness. And diets. And the 365 resolutions that will hopefully last more than 365 minutes.

Its overrrrrrr!!
Again. For another 10 months (we all know it starts in November as soon as we have washed off the fake blood stains from our clothes). As much as I have enjoyed it there is a big part of me happy to take down the tinsel.

The top 5 things I am most looking forward to are:

1. No more sweating over Christmas lights

We love a Christmas light in our house. We had every surface covered in twinkling lights of every description. Even the lack of plug sockets did not hold us back.  No sirree. Since the advent of the battery-powered fairy light (what an invention) we have had a no holds barred approach to lumination. With approximately 10 battery-powered fairy lights on the go, it presented a daily dilemma. Who is worthy of the battery power? I didn’t want to spend billions on batteries so each evening would laboriously be spent putting on the battery lights and turning them back off when the kids were in bed. Except for Christmas eve when I allowed the husband to enjoy the flashing fanfare. It seems the Christmas lights are more attention grabbing than toddlers during Yuletide. In addition to the battery quandary, there was the nightly stand off each evening on who would unplug the rest of the display before bed. Then there was the “have we turned off the Christmas tree lights?” and “will they set the house on fire?” dread every time we stepped outside the front door. Oh the joys!

2. No more keeping the house tidy in case of guests

Did you do that thing? You know were you are relaxing post bacon butty with a open box of Celebrations on your lap when you panicked that someone might just call to visit and catch you in mismatched PJs amid toy Armageddon? Many a moment was ruined by such paranoia. And do you know what? No one turned up when the house was spick and span. Oh no. If anyone did indeed come (not sure who I was expecting) it was just after I had changed a nappy or when I was having a lie in and the husband was in charge downstairs alone (think dens, discarded night wear and undergarments mixed in with the breadcrumbs of a million four slices of toast).

3. No more eating everything you see

Mini hero? Yes please. Peanuts? Go on then. Turkey and cranberry sandwich? Crisps with a selection of dips? Mince pie? Weird beef wellington bites? Why the hell not. Pickled onion? More cake? Roses? Curry in? Curry out? Pizza? Chinese? Fish and chips?  Another roast dinner (with the works)? Ah well bring it on. It’s Christmas. As lush as it all was I am slightly over the gluttony now. Yesterday the hubby asked what I wanted for my tea and do you know what I craved? A boiled egg with toast. Better still a bowl of tomato soup. With water.

4. No more being jolly 24 hours a day

Merriment, laughter, mirth and a sprinkle of hee hee and ho ho. It was good while it lasted but I am now a bit fed up with festive cheer. You are not really allowed to moan in December (otherwise Santa won’t come) and there is only so much organised frivolity and fun one can take. I’ve really missed my whine with wine and my bitch with beer. Naturally cantankerous, I now come into my own in the bleak mid winter when everyone is lamenting and filled with woe. Fantastic stuff.

5. No more shopping

My Fridays off will no longer be spent in retail parks or growling at strangers over parking spaces. No more stressing about whether I have spent £50 to get my £7 off in my weekly shop (damn you enticing supermarket vouchers). No more purchasing a daily tub of Celebrations. I don’t have to look at another sparkly top for a year and wonder if I’ll look fab or like a bejeweled fool. Nor do I have to spend my waking moments cursing Walt Disney for only making two Elsa dresses and one Olaf doll just for sheer sport as if he was bored of raking in millions.

Christmas, I will miss you.

You did me proud.

But I’m off to grumble and gripe on the phone to my mate whilst eating my plain eggy soldiers in my filthy house with only one bulb to light my way. Happy days.

Gabe says: “Mum did you get any cream eggs in the shop today?
Only 89 days to go!”

10 Comments on 5 reasons why I am glad the festive fun has finished

  1. normaleverydaylife
    January 5, 2015 at 11:42 pm (5 years ago)

    Our kids go back to school tomorrow and I'm looking forward to getting back into a routine, too! Happy New Year!

    Reply
  2. Sian PottyMouthedMummy
    January 6, 2015 at 6:34 pm (5 years ago)

    Ha this is ruddy brilliant lovely! I live christmas completely but this has tickled me nonetheless xx

    Reply
  3. Californian Mum in London
    January 6, 2015 at 7:21 pm (5 years ago)

    Heehee so funny. I loved Xmas too, but also am so relieved it's all over and life can be a bit more normal! Xx

    Reply
  4. Steph Douglas
    January 6, 2015 at 7:36 pm (5 years ago)

    I hear you! Fabulous stuff. And OH the gluttony. Bleurgh.

    Reply
  5. brummymummyof2
    January 6, 2015 at 8:01 pm (5 years ago)

    Apologies if I comment twice! Phone is being weird! Congrats on blog of the day lovely. I'm still eating. This is one I can't shake! x

    Reply
  6. Emma Martin
    January 6, 2015 at 9:17 pm (5 years ago)

    Oh this is hilarious Ali! I love the mismatched PJ's post bacon butty – that was so us for a whole week! :) I literally hid from the postman! Just brilliant as ever xxx

    Reply
  7. Sam - Up All Hours
    January 7, 2015 at 5:30 am (5 years ago)

    Love this! So true. I am with you! Happy New Year and here's to a water filled January x

    Reply
  8. Honest Mum
    January 9, 2015 at 8:55 am (5 years ago)

    I feel the same, we had a lovely Christmas but it's time for the new year and normality to resume! Loved this post. #teaandcake

    Reply
  9. Natasha
    January 9, 2015 at 9:51 am (5 years ago)

    haha loved this post…I LOVE Christmas but this year I'm glad to be back to some normality in the new year! #teaandcake

    Reply
  10. Judith Hurrell
    January 13, 2015 at 12:25 pm (5 years ago)

    Hope you're enjoying your grubby house. I am wallowing in mine – but at least there's no more pine needles to worry about, ahey? Great post x

    Reply

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